Our Designer Life

“You’re where you’re supposed to be because you’ve designed it that way.”

“Shi*, she’s right…”

A friend took me to a spin class and the environment is very energetic and positive. While sweating profusely, the instructor was shouting inspiring comments and that’s when I heard the quote opening the post.

We can feel like life gets out of control sometimes, and I can see how. The funny thing is that we’re always in control; there is never a moment when we’re not steering our ship. I seem to forget that.

I’ve reflected and realized that I’ve been unhappy in some situations, blaming the outside for my frustrations. Instead of looking inward, I stuck things out, hoping that others would change or that circumstances would figure themselves out.

When nothing changed, I acted surprised. I thought it was going to be different this time, but here we are x amount of time later, still stuck in the same crap. In the end, I stewed in the resentment instead of redesigning what I want my life to be.

The last couple years have taught me that having hopeful expectations that situations or people will progress for our liking is an endless, fruitless chore. We can't design others, as much as we want to.

There comes a point where the life we’ve designed is no longer tolerable. It’s keeping us back to getting to the next level, but to get there, we have to move forward. You shouldn’t feel bad for wanting to be better and if that means moving on from a boyfriend, job, your hometown, whatever, then go for it.

The status quo is designed to flourish because only effort can change it. But when you’re sick of what the status quo has given you, it's back to the drawing board.