Wake up at 530am, I hit the snooze button, in fact, I turn off my alarm all together. No reason for me to get up, I'll wake up when I feel like it.
As the sun lightens my entire room, thus waking me, I look at my phone to see that it is now 830. Three extra hours of sleep and I still didn't want to get out of bed. Why? I knew what my day had in store for me and my motivation to tackle it was zero. What's the point of getting hyped when the days become redundant? It was like the movie Groundhog Day except I wasn't learning anything new or waking up next to Andie MacDowell.
It started with a lack of motivation, which persisted and grew into despair. Without motivation, there was no effort to change my day in order to make it exciting. It became a disease that infected my entire mindset towards other things in life. So i laid in bed and stared my ceiling until my body finally said get the hell out and go do something. Even then, I was a zombie cruising through errands.
It was apparent to others that I was unhappy. I'd reply that I was very happy, just tired, which I believed at the time was true. Looking back, I was depressed, I was bothered that my life became mundane and a thoughtless routine. I knew I was better than that, but didn't know how to break out of that spell which was telling me otherwise.
How did I break it? I had enough on a Saturday morning and decided it was time to adjust my thoughts. The first step was meditation. I found a quiet place and cleared my mind of the nonsense it was filled with and replaced it with gratitude and positivity. Any negative thought pass through and wasn't given a second ponder. I let my negative thoughts and situations fester, which led me to living a negative life with an ugly outlook. Getting my mind right allowed me to jump out of bed at 5am and be in the right frame to kick some ass.
Now that I'm here, how do I make sure that I never go back to that sad space? Practice every day on getting my mind focused on positivity and keeping the negativity on the outside, reading inspiring items that will make me think, and laying off the booze helps as well. I'm sure there are going to be situations that I'm gonna be deflated or angry, but they're just outside influences, they aren't residing within us unless we give them the space to.